Do/did you feel pressured to have a relationship?

[BlackCryptoKnight]

Do you or did you ever feel pressured to have a relationship (girlfriend/boyfriend)? Do you seek out such relationships because you feel that something is wrong with you if you don't, or do you just let things progress naturally?

[Leina]

Do you or did you ever feel pressured to have a relationship (girlfriend/boyfriend)? Do you seek out such relationships because you feel that something is wrong with you if you don't, or do you just let things progress naturally?

i'm sad to say that i'm one of those ppl who believe that if i'm not in a relationship then something is wrong with me. I've been trying to stop but u know what they say habits are easy to make and hard to break

[BlackCryptoKnight]

i'm sad to say that i'm one of those ppl who believe that if i'm not in a relationship then something is wrong with me.
Why do you feel that way?

[Leina]

Why do you feel that way?

i'm not sure maybe its peer pressure, most of my friends think that something is wrong if i don't have a boyfriend. My bestfriend (who is a guy) tells me i shudn't listen to them but it look like seh it too late

[Bahama Mama]

No I have never felt pressured to be in a relationship. All of the relationships that I have been in I have embraced. However during those periods when I was single, people often looked flabergastered when I told them , 'No I dont have a boyfriend'. I dont get this mentality. Being in a relationship should not define a person for who they are, it should in fact compliment their life, and represent the icing on the cake. I always tell people that I would prefer to be happy and single, than be in a relationship and miserable. Whoever cannot except my singledom, or see it as extremely abnormal and criticize me, then that is their buisness.

[Chicokid]

I admit yes and this only started in recent times. All of the "close" pals I work around with are in relationships with me being the odd one old. Plus I've been asked on several occasions when would I get a girl firend to hang out with.

[dtgo]

IM OKAY without a relationship right now, im more of making "casual" calls

as i said im having fun right now

[Ricky]

Yeah! while I was in high school my brother would tease me. he is older than I am and he had many girlfriends. I felt like I had to keep up. I started having relationships (serious relationships) at age 14, I was hardly ready for them.

[Manu]

Well....at one point it was all about racking up statisitics....you know...bedding women. But then I had a very close female friend....who enlightened me. I thought about my sister, her or even my mother falling prey to men like me. I sought relationships afterwards. I love female company. I like being single but i think I prefer being ina relationship. i feel a need to have a counterpart....even if it's just sexual....lol...but still...i need to be in one....i think!

[Blindz]

naww, no pressure, yes I have co-workers and friends asking y I'm not in a relationship etc, but as the option says, everything happens in its own time so I'm just currently enjoying the single life situation.

[Drew]

never felt pressure yet about being in a relationship.

[Ricky]

never felt pressure yet about being in a relationship.

chrrrpss.....not even a little? you seem to be in a world by yuself. I tink yuh mean seh yuh never fall to de pressure but yuh mus feel it at some point.

[Xenocrates]

:icon_arro Ricky

Drew is a chick magnet. So much so that he has a hired hand to keep the femmes away when he's not in the mood. Therefore, it is highly unlikely that he feels any pressure to be in one. Ya dig? ;)

[Cocoa]

No pressure whatsoever.... I pick and choose who I want to be with when ready.

[Xenocrates]

...ofcourse you guys know I'm kidding about drew right? The hired hand only comes around on weekends. :D

[Drew]

...ofcourse you guys know I'm kidding about drew right? The hired hand only comes around on weekends. :D
lol, hear ya now. but ketch the joke, look who talking. xeno seh 1 sentence to the ladies and them head get mix up. :icon_mrgr

[Manu]

Maybe they are confused by the jargons being used....lol!!!

[Xenocrates]

I have a knack for doing that to people. Ladies or otherwise... :eusa_thin

[AngelsKiss]

Maybe they are confused by the jargons being used....lol!!!

DWL....oh my goodness what can I say since I don't want to repeat myself :icon_mrgr

[Drew]

I have a knack for doing that to people. Ladies or otherwise... :eusa_thin
.... and i think i know why. :D

[g2cris]

What type of relationship? Commited or casual?

Committed - NO
Casual - Only if i'm not in a committed relationship.

Reason - Nature. LOL

[LadyMC]

I always felt that not being in a relationship made me weird. I actually never really seeked to be in a relationship though.

[Gwadinka]

I don't feel any pressure coming from me.

But it's true that ppl around me always feel sorry when I say that I'm single. As if it was some interesting soap, when will she be with a guy? :confused: Plus I soupçonne some of my friends to talk behind my back and wonder whether I'm lesbian. Strange isn't it that you're under pressure to get in a relationship just so that ppl leave you alone. :rolleyes:

But I like being single. ;)

[pogi_2nr]

You get with a guy so people stop wondering about your sexual preferences?

wrong reasons.

[Drew]

i agree with pogi. you rather make them happy than yourself?? you said you like being single, stay single for as long as you want until you feel the need to get into a commited relationship.

[Gwadinka]

OH NO NO NO NON nEVER janmé bon dié!!!!!!

I did not say that I do it, I just say that it is what some have come to that point and I know girls that run from guy to guy just to be considered as normal. I'd rather know myself first by being single and then get with a guy knowing what I want, who I am.

[chany86]

did i ever feel pressured to have a relationship? yes, but not by other ppl. its usually the suitor who i was afraid to say no to. I said no nevertheless, even though i was a shy gurl and didnt want to hurt ne-one's feelings. i never got teased by any-one; ppl used to admire me for my stance when it comes on to entering into relationships.

[pogi_2nr]

Whats with this getting to know myself first argument? I have gotten to know myself
pretty well as I am mostly single, and trust me there is a lot more to learn when you
are with somebody.

Regards,
Pogi Tuner.

[Gwadinka]

My dear Pogi,

I too have been single for about 20 yrs but it's only recently that I started understanding many things about myself and why I acted the way I did. When I left my family for my studies it was a huge step, and I didn't think that I could handle this whole new life while being in a relationship. And now, I'm going further by doing things only because I want to do them, and not because others want me to ...and I swear that it ain't easy to give up this bad habit .That's what I was trying to say...nuttin else.

Regards, Gwadinka

[pogi_2nr]

You have been single for 20 years? but your profile sayes that you are 21!

Confused.

[Gwadinka]

:)
Yes because I've been in a relationship before
It did not last an entire year tough...but it is the addition of all the non serious things. ;)

[LadyMC]

:)
Yes because I've been in a relationship before
It did not last an entire year tough...but it is the addition of all the non serious things. ;)
Hehe.... kinda sounds like me... :eusa_shif

[nuhsenutten]

i think gwadinka misunderstood pongi....i think pongi means that gwadinka's been single since she was 1yr old.... :icon_eek:

[Drew]

lol, the ute name pogi.

[Gwadinka]

Oh Nuhsenutten!!!
You're bad,I don't think that Mr Pogi Tuner understood it like that...I'm right Pogi? Anyway, we are not answering the question...What you guys think?

[pogi_2nr]

I am confused as usual.

Anyway.. I need to be in a relationship right about now :icon_redf
I am an affectionate young man so full with luv that I am
bursting at the seams. I hug a pillow or a teadybear when
I go to sleep at night :icon_frow

[kelly]

I am confused as usual.

Anyway.. I need to be in a relationship right about now :icon_redf
I am an affectionate young man so full with luv that I am
bursting at the seams. I hug a pillow or a teadybear when
I go to sleep at night :icon_frow
do you NEED OR WANT to be in a relationship right now pogi.well hopefully someone will come along to return all that affection and love.who knows pretty soon you will be hugging a human being instead of your pillow at nights. :D

[pogi_2nr]

need is the word I chose to use as I can see myself getting into trouble
with other people's women since I dont have any of my own :) :(

[kelly]

:) need is the word I chose to use as I can see myself getting into trouble
with other people's women since I dont have any of my own :) :(
you need to be careful.some people don't take those things lightly anymore these days.get one of your own.

[pogi_2nr]

Thats what I am saying! I wont put my hand in the cookie jar but the
cookie jar comes over my house and drops cookies everywhere... on
a daily basis too. heh

[kelly]

Thats what I am saying! I wont put my hand in the cookie jar but the
cookie jar comes over my house and drops cookies everywhere... on
a daily basis too. heh
REALLY?why do i get the feeling that you don't feel regretful when tha supposedly "cookie jar" came over to your house pogi? :)

[pogi_2nr]

It seems as if you are trying to instantiate my metaphors and hypothetical situations.

[kelly]

It seems as if you are trying to instantiate my metaphors and hypothetical situations.
FOR REAL?I WOULDN'T WANT TO DO THAT POGI.REALLY!!! :icon_redf

[pogi_2nr]

I could be the cookie monster to your cookie jar ;)

[kelly]

I could be the cookie monster to your cookie jar ;)
TO MY COOKIE JAR?I DONT THINK SO!!!!

[pogi_2nr]

does somebody else own the cookies?

[Malloc-X]

what kind of cookie unno talkin bout, cookie nuh somethin u eat? mine what u eatin pogi

[kelly]

does somebody else own the cookies?
whats it to you pogi? :confused:

[kelly]

what kind of cookie unno talkin bout, cookie nuh somethin u eat? mine what u eatin pogi
he sure ain't gonna be eating my cookie. :rotflm:

[pogi_2nr]

hmm.. how about a taste or just a lick?

[Gillion]

Good grief.... pogi you have no style.

[pogi_2nr]

yeah, I lost that in a hunting accident a few years back.

[kelly]

hmm.. how about a taste or just a lick?
NOT EVEN A LICK POGI!!!!!! :)

[pogi_2nr]

aww, sharing is caring I always say. I guess you dont care much.

[kelly]

Good grief.... pogi you have no style.
couldn't agree with you more about that one!!!!!! :icon_redf

[kelly]

aww, sharing is caring I always say. I guess you dont care much.
yes sharing is caring depending on what you are sharing and how mch you are going to be sharing with that person.

[pogi_2nr]

yes sharing is caring depending on what you are sharing and how mch you are going to be sharing with that person.
lol what do you think I was talking about when I said cookie monster and cookie jar?

[kelly]

lol what do you think I was talking about when I said cookie monster and cookie jar?
why don't you tell me what you were talking about. :)

[Chilli pepper]

this is interesting go on

[Chilli pepper]

is it me are is kelly and pogi taking all the threads an turning them into thier personal discussion

why dont you guys get a room or at least ur own thread

[pogi_2nr]

Hey I was actually talking about cookies.
http://www.pepperidgefarm.com/images/history/1980_cookies_image.jpg

:eusa_ange :eusa_ange

[Malloc-X]

hmm.. how about a taste or just a lick?
noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

acid go fi di fish and skuba gear

[kelly]

is it me are is kelly and pogi taking all the threads an turning them into thier personal discussion

why dont you guys get a room or at least ur own thread
OH FOR CHRIST SAKE you called that personal CHILLI?if i'm not right i think i can recall KIRBY participating in the conversation and other persons too so GET YOUR FACTS STRAIGHT MISS KNOW IT ALL. :rotflm:

[Chilli pepper]

well my take on the subject of relationship and pressures is

i always feel pressured to b in relationships by my suitors......They become so persistent and persusasive that i decide to give them a chance. Call it what u may pity or sorry for.........i always end up loving them one way or the other in the end

These r the times when im single and this is very rare ..........it seems like there is a publication to tenders as soon as i'm single..........the good thing about it is that when i choose one i am allowed to tell the others that im attached or involved so they back off after a while


my question is do you think that the more persistent suitors are genuinely interested more so than the others????????????????????????????

Please respond

[kelly]

well my take on the subject of relationship and pressures is

i always feel pressured to b in relationships by my suitors......They become so persistent and persusasive that i decide to give them a chance. Call it what u may pity or sorry for.........i always end up loving them one way or the other in the end

These r the times when im single and this is very rare ..........it seems like there is a publication to tenders as soon as i'm single..........the good thing about it is that when i choose one i am allowed to tell the others that im attached or involved so they back off after a while


my question is do you think that the more persistent suitors are genuinely interested more so than the others????????????????????????????

Please respond
not necessarily chilli.you see some persons may be genuinly interested in that person but they are some person on the other hand that will only persue a relationship just for a score or because certain person told them they can't reach that far with that particualr girl.sometime they do end up being genuine in the middle of the game but some persons actually play it out to the end in ja jokify manner. :)

[pogi_2nr]

No, not really. A guy could really like you but will give up after you
shoot him down once coz he thinks he doesnt really have a chance.

[kelly]

No, not really. A guy could really like you but will give up after you
shoot him down once coz he thinks he doesnt really have a chance.
som of them will back down but not all of them pogi.even when it reaches the stage of exchanging insults. :)

[Kirby]

is it me are is kelly and pogi taking all the threads an turning them into thier personal discussion

why dont you guys get a room or at least ur own thread

is it just me or does somebody seem jelous

[kelly]

is it just me or does somebody seem jelous
it seems to me that that person is jealous. :rotflm: :dwl:

[pogi_2nr]

no need to call names or point fingers or make such assumptions now.

[kelly]

no need to call names or point fingers or make such assumptions now.
why is everyone getting so serious?this is supposed to be fun right?we weren't calling names or pointing fingers POGI. :confused: CHILLI COPULD YOU PLEASE COME ONLINE AND EXPRESS YOURSELF AND TELL US IF YOU ARE OFFENDED?

[Gillion]

No, not really. A guy could really like you but will give up after you
shoot him down once coz he thinks he doesnt really have a chance.
In Soviet Russia we call that Darwinism.

If the man is not stong enough to take the first shoot down the he ain't strong enough to deal with her in the first place especially over a longer term.

Basic biology... there is a reason women make "courtship" difficult.

[kelly]

In Soviet Russia we call that Darwinism.

If the man not stong enough to take te first shoot down he ain't string enough to dea with her in the first place.
AT LEAST WE HAVE SOMEONE ON BOARD WIT THE CHARACTERISTIC OF persistence. :eusa_clap

[pogi_2nr]

oh no, that isnt saying much for me :(

[kelly]

oh no, that isnt saying much for me :(
what isn't saying much for you pogi?

[BlackCryptoKnight]

For those who say they feel like they have to be in a relationship, where did that notion come from? What's so bad about being on your own for a while until you find the right person?

[Gillion]

For those who say they feel like they have to be in a relationship, where did that notion come from? What's so bad about being on your own for a while until you find the right person?
a) Misery loves company

b) People feel uncomfortbale with those who are doing a different thing from the "group"

c) Sex

[Bahama Mama]

For those who say they feel like they have to be in a relationship, where did that notion come from? What's so bad about being on your own for a while until you find the right person?

The fear of being alone and without close companionship, is an inherent weakness (if I may use that term) in alot of individuals. Alot of people simply cant withstand the notion of being on their own (single), because they attach so much of their emotional and mental strength to someone else, instead of possessing that quality singularly.

From a personal standpoint, singledom provides an interesting view of life, and as far as the view is concerned I am enjoying it for now.

[Chicokid]

For those who say they feel like they have to be in a relationship, where did that notion come from? What's so bad about being on your own for a while until you find the right person?

Peer pressure again. Persons going into relationships to prevent themselves from being alienated from their peers.

[BlackCryptoKnight]

Does this pressure to be in a relationship cause some people to settle for situations which are not ideal?

[Chicokid]

Does this pressure to be in a relationship cause some people to settle for situations which are not ideal?

Possibly so that pals can "fit in" with others.

[BlackCryptoKnight]

Possibly so that pals can "fit in" with others.

After people "fit in", then what? Is that really fulfilling?

[KriTikaL]

i feel UGLY wen i haven't been in a relationship for a while... :icon_lol:

[KriTikaL]

After people "fit in", then what? Is that really fulfilling?
yes completely... nothing feels better than acceptance...
Yet still it's better to be hated for something you are than to be loved for something you are not...

[acidblade]

yes i have been pressured, u know the line, "i can't give it to you because we are not together" that was long time ago though, :eusa_shif

[Twinkie]

Bwoy brutally honest eeh?

Thank goodness for those ones that just sed yes right away don't it??

[acidblade]

Bwoy brutally honest eeh?

Thank goodness for those ones that just sed yes right away eeeeeh??
:icon_mrgr Quite So :icon_mrgr :rofl:

[nuhsenutten]

i feel UGLY wen i haven't been in a relationship for a while... :icon_lol:


eh eh ....come on now surely u can appreciate ur beauty without a man.






and no its not the way ur all thinking that im thinking

[Jae]

Sometimes it's better being on your own, it gives you time for you, something that some relationships don't allow, esp. real unhealthy ones.

[KriTikaL]

eh eh ....come on now surely u can appreciate ur beauty without a man.

i KNOW its there but if i haven't been in a relationship with someone telling me all the time i think NO ONE ELSE CAN SEE IT!

[acidblade]

i KNOW its there but if i haven't been in a relationship with someone telling me all the time i think NO ONE ELSE CAN SEE IT!
oh boy, so man easy fi ketch unno :rolleyes:

[Temptress]

yes i have been pressured, u know the line, "i can't give it to you because we are not together" that was long time ago though, :eusa_shif

Sure Bladey...... if you call 5 minutes long.



I think those who always have to be in a relationship have a low selfesteem so the first thing/person that looks at them they snatch them up as if its their last or only chance to say that they are attached...... so lame tsk tsk :eusa_snoo

[acidblade]

Sure Bladey...... if you call 5 minutes long.


:icon_evil :icon_evil :rolleyes:

[Temptress]

They say the truth hurts..... guess they were right :)

[KriTikaL]

oh boy, so man easy fi ketch unno :rolleyes:
it's like seeing a dancing elf in your room ALL the time... YOU KNO it's there you ain't crazy or off ur meds... but after a time if no one tells you its there you start doubting if it reli is.....:icon_ques anybody get me :icon_ques ...
:eusa_shif or is the elf really NOT there??????????

[BlackCryptoKnight]

it's like seeing a dancing elf in your room ALL the time... YOU KNO it's there you ain't crazy or off ur meds... but after a time if no one tells you its there you start doubting if it reli is.....:icon_ques anybody get me :icon_ques ...
:eusa_shif or is the elf really NOT there??????????
:dwl: :rofl: :eusa_clap

[pogi_2nr]

From what I notice girls normally feel need to be in a relationship as they require
a certain level of attention(if they arent strong and 90% of them arent :)). They
see other girls getting it and they want it.

This is just based on girls around my age.

[Temptress]

From what I notice girls normally feel need to be in a relationship as they require
a certain level of attention(if they arent strong and 90% of them arent :)). They
see other girls getting it and they want it.

This is just based on girls around my age.

This is sooooo true.
I know a girl that thinks the same way and she has constantly been choosing some bastard that she allows to treat her like sh--. As she and 1 break up couple days she's with some other guy. I think she has to have someone because:
1. all her freinds are in some form of relationship
2. she thinks less of herself if she's not with someone

I honestly think that she'd rather be attached and miserable than single and at peace. So sad...

[KriTikaL]

I honestly think that she'd rather be attached and miserable than single and at peace. So sad...
issues!!!!!! :eusa_whis
sort your girl out temp.

[Temptress]

Tried for 4 years... some people you just can't help ~ hopefully one day she'll figure it out.

[pogi_2nr]

err I should explain myself further, by attention I mean:
- money
- car
- b****
- food
- feel up

[nuhsenutten]

err I should explain myself further, by attention I mean:
- money
- car
- b****
- food
- feel up

these are now reffered to as the 5 F's

Food
Funds
Fast Car (honda preferably)
F***
Fi***er

[pogi_2nr]

fence up that post before BCN get wicked on you!

[BlackCryptoKnight]

So it mainly boils down to security/self-esteem. :eusa_thin

[Miss Thang]

Its nice to have a companion on those lonely stressfuldays but....... sometimes 1 just needs their space. Ive been single for a while and Im starting to enjoy not having to check in...lol

[Chicokid]

Not too good to be pressured into a relationship. You might end up with someone whom you cant get along with or probably just not your type. Best thing to do is to stay single until you can find the ultimate partner.

When the right one comes along, you always know :)

[silentburn]

Is it really pressure or is it just want?

Most human beings want relationships, right? I certainly know that the idea of companionship pops up into my mind quite frequently.

I guess females would more likely feel pressured to be in relationship since they are more likely the ones being aggressively pursued. Maybe men who have impregnated a girl may also feel pressured to take up a committed relationship.

Apart from that, most of it is just people feeling they need a relationship, they are not being pressured. They just have a need and they want it filled.

Some people are just mentally/emotionally unstable and hence the thought and the want for companionship overtakes them and they think they can't do without it.

Another thing, some people have random sex every few months or so yet they still see themselves as single and then they turn around and say they don't have a need for a relationship yet every few months the need is being casually filled.

I think we all need some form of companionship, even if its just friendship.

I seem to be one of those persons who will always feel the need for companionship :eusa_wall damnit, its a weakness. Suppose I remain single for the rest of my life, will the need/want always be lurking in the background? :icon_eek: