If your spouse had different beliefs from you, which would you teach your kids?

[BlackCryptoKnight]

If you and your spouse had different religious beliefs, which beliefs would you teach your children? How would you handle their religious instruction?

[deakie]

hehehe....its funny, and i can say it.....we let them hear both sides to the argument from each and then tell them to formulate their opinion later on in life as they are too young now to make up their minds.
they can ask us as much questions as they like and we tell them the truth as we know it. with the additional instruction that this truth that be told to them is from our own bias and experiences as the world is changing, they might find things that we say may differ latter on down and so should be able to adapt reasonably to these changes without compromising who they are.

you see, this idea of strictness dont work for me. just cowers the kid who then goes on to be cruel later on. just my belief though.
funnily enough, my kids call me by my name and whenever they say dad, i get real worried as i know that means they are after summin....... :icon_mrgr

[Cocoa]

If you and your spouse had different religious beliefs, which beliefs would you teach your children? How would you handle their religious instruction?That's a toughie. Hmmm....I would teach them mine. And obviously if their father wants to impart his, as long as it is not causing death or compromising my beliefs. I would leave the kids to choose for themselves later on in life.

>>> I give yu 2 good licks BCK fi coming up wid dat one. (lash lash) :icon_lol:

[BlackCryptoKnight]

>>> I give yu 2 good licks BCK fi coming up wid dat one. (lash lash) :icon_lol:

Umm... could ya change the licks to hits...lest I get in trouble with mi wifey? :icon_redf ;)

[deakie]

soooo jcb, you would not actively encourage you hubby to give his side of the story eeeee.....tch tch.... :eusa_doh:

[Cocoa]

I did say so indirectly D.

And obviously if their father wants to impart his, as long as it is not causing death or compromising my beliefs.


Umm... could ya change the licks to hits...lest I get in trouble with mi wifey? Hits sounds like abuse. Naw, just a few smack bottom. LOL

[deakie]

'if' being the word that is telling there......bout 'if'....you mean you woulda neva..... :icon_twis

[Cocoa]

Yes, 'if', operative word. That's 'if' he wants to share it with the kids. Gosh D. yu slow sometimes to man..lol

[Arch_Angel]

Firstly, I wouldn't be marrying a woman that had different religous beliefs than mine. That's a no-no for me. That would cause conflict and a strain through-out the relationship. Something that couples don't need to add to a marriage as marriage itself comes with problems of it's own that both need to deal with.

[deakie]

love has no boundaries and when it occurs, its blind to reason....


@jcb...lol

[Cocoa]

Like I said..."how can 2 walk together unless they be agreed?"

[Arch_Angel]

As it is said in 2 Corinthians 6:14 (http://bible.gospelcom.net/bible?passage=2COR+6&language=english&version=NIV)
14 Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?

[Greatis]

hmm that's a hard question...
I have noticed ans like
14 Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?

That's beside the point, that's not the question... you are in the situation how would you treat it...

Anywayz I was watching a program on television called in the life I think... This particular program was highlighting Mrs. Barbara Gloudon... Now she is an Anglican and her husband is a Seven Day Adventist... And that was hmmm what they have been married for over 30yrs I think not exactly sure but I know they have passed 25yrs...

[Cocoa]

Being in the situation is another case truly. My sisters and their husbands have different beliefs in matters and they are still married and teaching the children their ways.

I had a friend who was muslim and me being of the christian faith. We dated for 6 months and I tell you, that relationship was one of the best. He treated me like a princess and I never had to compromise my beliefs. He knew how I felt about his faith and vice versa. But overral, he got treated like a soul, a person and viceversa. It was a good relationship.

So being in the situation is definately another case.

[Chris]

Like others, I wouldn't put myself in that situation.

But if we use the operative word "if" and the beliefs were totally opposite to each other then the answer would be that I'd teach them my beliefs, but the conflict would also occur if the spouse uses the same approach and teaches them hers. Man, that would be one bunch of confused kids :)

[Arch_Angel]

I can't answer the question then, because I wouldn't be in that situation. So I wouldn't know what I would do.

I have watched a tesitmony on one of those christian tv shows, how two people married with different religous background. They said, they just taught thier children both religions and made them decide which one they want to choose. If they want to follow daddy's religion, daddy sits down with them and teach them his religion. Likewise, if they choose mommy's religion.

From what i remember, they say it's hard when thier children pick one religion over the other. But they are dealing with it. :rolleyes:

I don't need that in my marriage.

[Cocoa]

True A_A. I would rather play it safe and not marry the atheist. ;)

[Arch_Angel]

True A_A. I would rather play it safe and not marry the atheist. ;)
LOL!!! If you married an atheist, God help you. LOL!!!

[Chicokid]

I guess a situation like this one:

Suppose both you and your spouse were both muslims, married together as muslims then all of a sudden one decides to turn into a christian. Stuff like this is possible plus you have to deal with it instead of taking the dreadfull divorce.

PS: I won't marry a woman with different beliefs than me

[Arch_Angel]

Usually in that case Chico, the one who became a Christian would share thier faith with the other. Usually, the other would end up trying it out too, as they see a change in them since they became a Christian.

[Chicokid]

Usually in that case Chico, the one who became a Christian would share thier faith with the other. Usually, the other would end up trying it out too, as they see a change in them since they became a Christian.

Sometimes that works..other cases can be a headache.

I've seen a case with two non-christians getting married and the wife becomes a christian. Many, many times she tried bringing her husband (who drinks alot) in church for him to change. All that with no success.

[seanbee]

I am kinda in this position myself, but my case is not that extreme. My girlfriend wants to go back into church and she is seventh day and I am a baptist. We had an argument about which day the child would worship on, me of course would want the child to worship on a sunday with me, but she would want the child to worship on a saturday.

While we have not yet formulated a solution, it would be unfair to drag the child into a thug of war of beliefs, so I believe that both parents should come to a compromise before trying to impart their individual beliefs on the child.

[BlackCryptoKnight]

While we have not yet formulated a solution, it would be unfair to drag the child into a thug of war of beliefs, so I believe that both parents should come to a compromise before trying to impart their individual beliefs on the child.
So what do you do when your beliefs and your partner's beliefs do not accomodate compromise on certain issues such as day of worship, food etc. ?

[Chris]

Bwoy sean you're oing to have a challenge there. This is where PRAYER comes in ;)

[deakie]

isnt everyday like the sabbath?

[seanbee]

Bwoy as what Chris says, prayer will be needed

[Cocoa]

Let us pray........... :eusa_pray :eusa_pray Dear Lord Jesus.....

[BlackCryptoKnight]

Usually in that case Chico, the one who became a Christian would share thier faith with the other. Usually, the other would end up trying it out too, as they see a change in them since they became a Christian.
Like Chico said, this isn't necessarily true. Marriages have broken up because one spouse becomes a Christian. Sometimes, the non-Christian spouse doesn't like the conversion. Sometimes the conversion leads the Christian to realize that they need to get out of a bad situation. But the situation I was really getting at, is that in which before marriage, the two people are of different faiths.

[Manu]

The unequal yolk ting is a serious thing and should be viewed as such...but once God in the mix...it should all work out!

[bernie]

bwoy mi sorry but das why mi try fi find a woman with similar beliefs

[Cocoa]

bwoy mi sorry but das why mi try fi find a woman with similar beliefsFi real cause I don't want to be stuck confusing the child the difference in religion and beliefs and who is right from wrong.

[BlackCryptoKnight]

So if you are in the situation where your beliefs are different from your spouses, then how do you handle the religious instruction of the children?

[jadakai]

am in a situation like that my self. I hav had to give up eating certain sea creatures bec my partner thinks they are scavengers, i decided to respect the sabbath...i tell you we hav had many discussions abt different religious ideas. wat i have tried is to really prove to him the things i stand up for and that wat i beleive is some thing in line with what God loves and vice versa for him. When we jus started I got headaches abt it, but I soon came to realize that there is only one way to truth, no matter how people might claim that there are or create shortcuts and unofficial roads to it. Therefore, we must come to the one common road, before the children come along:eusa_pray:eusa_pray

[BlackCryptoKnight]

am in a situation like that my self. I hav had to give up eating certain sea creatures bec my partner thinks they are scavengers, i decided to respect the sabbath...i tell you we hav had many discussions abt different religious ideas. wat i have tried is to really prove to him the things i stand up for and that wat i beleive is some thing in line with what God loves and vice versa for him. When we jus started I got headaches abt it, but I soon came to realize that there is only one way to truth, no matter how people might claim that there are or create shortcuts and unofficial roads to it. Therefore, we must come to the one common road, before the children come along:eusa_pray:eusa_pray

It really is important to show a unified stance on things for the children.

I hope it all works out for you. Keep praying. :D

[jadakai]

you see it.....thanks

[Lady_Jade]

Well I wouldn't marry to someone of different faith anyway. But in case he strays like leave church or so, I would teach them the way of the Lord... When they get older they'll have the choice of whether or not they want to be christians- I would have done my job with the hope that they would stay in church.