Men and Women Issues

[InkyP1]

This is a Men and Women Issues. I put it that way so that people can always add to this thread about those types of issues. Im on alittle longer this morning because I have to go to court. Im going to court to be a witness in a case for my sister. The father of her son is trying to take her to court to get child support and custody of her son. He has never paid her any support for the child. The whole thing is a scheme and the reason I say that is because the guy is worthless. He never keeps a job and lives with his dad and doesnt have anything of his own. And my sister has job and she did air force reserve for years. So she is a hard worker, she owns a home, condo, and a timeshare in florida. So she has done pretty well. I dont even have that. But why is it when you go out here and work hard to get were you are, someone wants to get what you have? This guy is crap and I think here, he can even come to court with this after all he has a criminal history. I think in some places someone would have done something to him by now. Anyway thats the situation and I want to know your views.

[RobyG]

All I can say is that some men need to be far more responsible than they are now. Many women experience what you are going through now and I can just imagine how frustrating it can be. Women need to be careful and know what they are getting into because you have good and bad men in this world. I pray that things will work out for your sister.

[Bashment Girl]

The type of man that you're describing, I've been with a man like that. They're con artists who lack the courage to get whant they want on their own, so they make their living by leeching off of others. I was fortunate not to have a child with him, but I'll tell you this much...

Men in general only do what they can get away with. People in his life continue to allow him to be worthless, not better himself, and leech off of them.

Sorry your sister had to know an idiot like that. :cool:

[BlackCryptoKnight]

Was there anything that could have clued the lady in on this guy's true nature before the child was conceived? I have known people in similar situations, and there were usually warning signs. Be that as it may, it's always a sticky mess when there's a child involved and the parents don't get along.

[Bashment Girl]

Was there anything that could have clued the lady in on this guy's true nature before the child was conceived?

Yes there are soooo many! I remember in my situation I was trying so hard to make my ex get excited about his life and do SOMETHING! He was content with being IDLE and there was nothing I could do about that! I nver nagged him but I did up his resume and applied for jobs for him. He declined them because he could be bothered to go so far. He didn't want to get up so early... I mean... what I saw in him to start with... wasn't the real him at all and actually found that some people just are happy doing nothing!

The biggest clue would be a lack of motivation and, ambition. Apathy speaks volumes about a man.

[philben]

"Apathy speaks volumes about a man"

Yep. BG I would agree with you.

[BlackCryptoKnight]

An interesting question stemming from this situation...who should have custody of a child in the event that the two parents have severed their "man-woman" relationship? What criteria should be used to decide custody disputes? I know that different places have their own take on the matter. Some tend to favour the mother having custody, some are amenable to the father having custody etc. Is this guy wrong for seeking custody of his child?

[Kitten]

These cases are hard to for a court to know exactly what is going on. That is why they have to prove themselves in the court and bring evidence that verifies who they are. And then still may not be enough to show the full character of a person. Sometimes if you dont have enough proof to prove this person is not a good individual the judge can only go by what is presented to him. And if you cant show probable cause. Then they have to allow the visitation. Custody and child support are a different court and different hearing. These also you have to prove your rights to the child.

[Greatis]

This is the next question. Why is it that these dumb parents feel they should fight over the child and put the child through emotional stress just to satisfy their ego or whatever.

Why not just share the damn custody of the child?

[Kitten]

In some cases one or the other parent is unfit. Sometimes are parent is abusive or they have abandoned the child. There are alot of reasons. I know of a recent case were a women had tried to move away from her husband and get help to try and relocate. The man was abusive and did not want her to leave with the child. The lady sought help and tried to go get orders to get the man removed. But because the man was part owner of the house, she could not get him removed. She did not have any physical signs of abuse. They did not see him doing anything to her. So they would not help her based on her complaints. Because she could not find the resources she needed to get away she stayed with the man. He killed her and the child in the house and they found them dead in the house. The man had disappeared. There are alot of reasons that some people should not have custody of their children at all. Because they do not protect them and they dont protect themselves.