Windows 2004 Jamaican Version

[Chris]

Only a Jamaican would have written this:


Dear Customaz:

It look like dem mek a mistake an ship out couple a copies a WINDO 2003 -YARDIE VERSION.

If you fine seh yu ave a copy, no badder fret, mi ave di pill fi de sickness (translatian fi di comand dem)

Ere dem is:

When yuh open di Yardie edition yu wi si di openin screen.

It read: "WINDO 2003", wit a background picture of Halfway Tree Square.

Wen yuh start di program yuh wi ear di Bad bwoy antem:

"Murda-ra Blood de pan yu shoulda" By Buju Banton.

Please also note:

Recycle Bin is labeled "General penitentiary."

My Computer is called "A Fimi Own."

The Inbox is referred to as "Barrel come."

Deleted Items are referred to as "Ole Bungle"

Dial up Networking is called "Ring mi Cellular."

Control Panel is known as the "Babylon."

Hard Drive is referred to as "Reema an Jungle."

Instead of an error message yu wi si, "Wapp'n! Yuh Nu know wa yuh a do?"
pops up.

CHANGES IN TERMINOLOGY INA DI YARDIE EDITION:

OK..............Irie!
Cancel..........No badda dat man
Reset.......... Rewine
Yes.............seen!
No..............Na sa
Find............Look fi it nu
Browse..........Faas
Back............Tun roun
Help............(this is not a feature ..Jamaicans know it all an nuh need nuh elp)
Stop............Mi Dun now
Start...........Gwan troo
Settings........Di set up

Also note di keyboard setup! Di YARDIE EDITION na ave di letter "H." Wi doan use dat ina wi vocabulary. So dis is ow yu mus type certain "H" words:

Help????.. elp
Horrible?..Arrible
Heart ??? Art
Heavy ??.. Eby
Honda??.. Unda
Handkerchif ?.. Kerchief
Holiday ??? Alliday

NB. Certain words will trigger the auto correct feature such as "Smith" =Simit, this cannot be overwritten.
Many ave tried!! Dis triggers the "YARDIE GENERAL" whos sound file says back off, yu nuh no seh we run tings an tings nuh run we!!!

(The Office assistant no longer resides in the "WINDO 2003" package as im get Box up by de YARDIE GENERAL wid a Heineken Bokkle)

Please feel free to return any found YARDIE EDITION to the Home Office or instant deportation back to JA

[Greatis]

yow star dis a wan ya arrible :lol:

[kilaj1]

yo! ow much fi it...na bada mi will downlod e offa kazza!! :D

[Nastro]

Does anyone has the Serial number....the trial version done on mine and its telling....


"Yuh too damn cheap....Galang go buy the sinting!"

[kilaj1]

let me guess the CEO, CFO, President, Vice President and Chairman is some guy name Blacka :lol:

[Xenocrates]

I saw another version of this joke which posed it as the Yardie Virus. It was a lot more creative and it stated that in addition to what was already stated above, it would make the following changes to your PC:

Windows Features

Blue Screen of Death error title: "Eeehi, yu mash it up now!"
Start button: "Yasso"
Log Off: "Splurt"
Log Off/Shutdown PC: "Shap Lack"
Log Off/Restart PC: "Wheel an' come agen"
Log Off/New User: "'Low a next yute"

Common Windows Applications:

MS Word: "Letta"
MS Excel: "Maths"
MS Powerpoint: "Showaff"
MS Outlook: "Mi Diry"
Mediaplayer: "Flimshow"
MSN Messenger: "Chatbout"
Internet Explorer: "Igleniss"

Third Party Software

WinaAmp: "Session"
Roxio Easy Disc Creator: "Bootleg Studio"
Nero Burning Rom: "A betta Bootleg Studio"
Kazaa: "Ol pirates' tool to rob I"
Adobe Photoshop: "Colaring book"

Common Internet Explorer Error Messages

Error 403 (http://www.checkupdown.com/status/E403.html): "But yu fresh! A weh yu tink yu a go?"
Error 404 (http://www.checkupdown.com/status/E404.html): "Yu laas, no true?"
Error 407 (http://www.checkupdown.com/status/E407.html): "Di sicurity waa si yu drivas license"
Error 408 (http://www.checkupdown.com/status/E408.html): "It look like dem swalla di messig!"

[Chris]

Yeah Xeno, looks like the version I posted wasn't the original copy but yours is an original Windows "HEXP"

[Greatis]

that new addition hype Xeno. :biggrin: I wonder who wrote this? they were very creative.

[krys]

if this verion a 'windo hexpee' so good judge when dem release 'windo langhawn'